Rocksey had decided he needed to let his hair down before the Europe leg of the tour and we had been invited to a lavish party in the city of Berlin where coincidently was the first night of the European tour.Rocksey I said letting your hair down is one thing but dont you think you should at least wash it first, I was sure that during the 3 weeks in the States the nearest thing to water Rockseys hair had seen was Beer ! ! ! ! !..begrudgingly he gave in and washed his hair — its my image he shouted from the shower whilst singing one of the Spice Girls back catalogue “two become one if i’m not mistaken” – not very Grebo/grunge rock I thought but what the hell only I can hear him ! ! !
The part was in full swing by the time Rocksey & I arrived. Rocksey as normal was a carbon copy of a Kansas tornado leaving a trail of broken hearts and empty glasses behind him.He just bounced from model to bottle and back again. Me I just socialized whilst looking for Suki, and let him get on with it, knowing full well he was just playing the guests the same as his stage show, but all the time wishing he was back at home.
A little later out of the corner of my eye I caught sight of Rocksey hanging upside down from the banister legs held by Senor penguino and hes not the biggest of men, while some of the female guests tried to pour champagne in his mouth, nothing to unusual there but this time he was 25ft from the ground ! ! and Rocksey has a fear of heights. Well this new game didn’t last very long before Senor Penguino shouted his one and only Spanish phrase “mi penguino comé arozz” Rocksey realising that his next stop would be the floor below hasterly hauled himself back over the banister, where Rocksey tried to encourage senior penguino to have a go…. “NO WAY” blurted Penguino i know what your like, one waitress or the sniff of champagne and you’ll be off and “I’ll be doing a love smooch with the floor.
With this both hugged and waltzed off in the direction of the pool, Me and Sukie reclined on the sumptuously deep leather sofa while the whole world and their friends strutted by trying to get noticed and be seen talking to the right people, the only people me and Suki though were the right people were the hunky waiters clad in kilts and full highland regalia.Suki in her normal way fluttered her extraordinarily long eyelashes at one of the waiters,and he almost fell over himself trying to get to Suki before any of the others. Suki purred in his ear “a bottle of champagne – cold ICE cold” nipping his ear with the last word, this sent the poor boy into such a spin as, which can only be likened to a gazelle avoiding the talons of a lioness, as he made his way to the bar.
Suki whispered to me “do you think its true ?” What the fact that we wouldn’t be seeing either Rocksey or Senor penguino before the early hours ? No Suki said KILTS and what worn or not worn under them ?…….I’m going to find out when the waiter returns. .. This I knew could only end one way ! ! ! !
Meanwhile Rocksey and Penguino had found the pool and were in the middle of their usual betting wager.which culminated in Rocksey trying to swim the length of the pool in all his clothes backstroke with a full champagne bottle on his head, cheered on by a throng of female guests. this I wouldn’t have minded but Rockesy was wearing the new Mexicana Python boots I had bought him ! ! ! ! Python I hear you all shouting inhumane I also hear – – – but no Rocksey had found this skin in a dusty run down shop in Louisiana and was informed it was at least 70 years old – sent the skin to his friend and owner of Mexicana boots and had them made.. which I will add I paid for with Rocksey shouting “i’ll pay you when I get back in” some chance of that …..Back to the swimming Rocksey was going for it and ploughing through the water like a dreadnought encouraged by the screams and shouts of the female guests, penguino realising this could end badly for him took it upon himself to try to stop this dreadnaught from finishing, grabbing one of the many ropes suspended from the ceiling took an almighty run and launched himself on collision course with Rocksey. Gripping as tight as he could to the rope with one hand and skimming the water with another he hurtled towards the finish line and Rocksey where within inches of the finish removed the bottle from Rockseys forehead and shouting his trademark “mi Penguino Comé arroz” entered the pool like a world war two depth charge. Both now soaked and without a change of clothes, I’m glad to say Rocksey resisted the temptation and offers from many of the female guests to let them remove his soaked clothes and help dry him…. Upon finishing the Bottle of Champagne (1/2 full of pool water) I will add the two made off in search of dry clothes.
Suki was now getting impatient for her bottle of Champagne as she had affixed her makeup mirror to her shoe, she assures me Penguino told her about this so she could check up the waiters kilt. whilst idly chatting Suki felt a tap on her shoulder and spinning around came face to face with a bright red kilt and a bottle of champagne. never one to lose her cool or not follow her plan swiftly positioned her foot and let out a shriek, He’s got kids F*****g pants on not only that BUT KIDS PANTS with a picture of a CAR on them ! ! ! ! ! at which she glanced at the waiters face only to find SENOR PENGUINO smirking back at her, don’t you remember he said “i bought these in Spain last year whilst in Malaga” ! ! ! ! ! .
I could see Rocksey stood behind him laughing – “why are you dressed as waiters ?” Ah he said and retold me the story of the pool bets and the fact the only clothes they could borrow were some of the staff clothes. You could tell Rocksey had a few to may champagnes by his state of dress his kilt was on backwards his shirt was tied round his waist his beret formed a lump similar to Quasimodo’s in his jacket and still wearing his boots which I will add were still full of water, I suggested we make our excuses and leave…
Agreed he said, as we made our way to the door Rocksey commandeered 3 bottles “well you never know “he said… as we exited into the crisp night air I asked Rocksey “why did penguino have those pants with him” you know Penguino, he used to be a boy scout and he’s always prepared…….. with this Rocksey ran off down the drive kilt flying shouting “MI PENGUINO COMÉ ARROZ, MI PENGUINO COMÉ ARROZ” it would have been a really nice view the sun rising over the maple trees and the dew covered lawns glistening but for Rocksey running into the sunrise ! ! ! ! ! — Life goes on I guess . . . . . .